(Not Quite) Incredible: A Look Back at The Incredible Hulk

Looking good, readers! I’m glad to see your bright and shining faces again!

DAY 2:

Marvel fever had gripped the world. Iron Man was a bigger hit, both critically and commercially, than anybody thought it would be. The Community of Nerds united online, and debated everything from whether or not this scene was a reference to that movie (kinda like how they do now) to how close Leonardo DiCaprio was to signing a deal to be Captain America.

Don't give me that look! It was a serious rumor once!

Fun Fact: Brad Pitt was also rumored as Thor for a while. However, people were so focused on the future that the failed to see what was right in front of them. In retrospect, it was probably for the better. I should have known something was up when the promotional material for The Incredible Hulk included a trailer with the Tony Stark scene. You know, the last scene of the movie? It would have been like an Iron Man trailer featuring Nick Fury.

Preach it, Tony.

The Incredible Hulk smashed its way into cinemas in the summer of 2008, leaving the critical, commercial, and fanboy worlds relatively unchanged.

What They Did Right

References to the Show

You wouldn't like me when I’m angry. Hulk Smash. Purple pants. Green eyes. Lou Ferrigno. Sad walking-away music. These are some of the most iconic images in Hulk’s history, and this film manages to work each of them into the film in fairly entertaining ways. That's all I have for this one. I will say, I am more than a little disheartened that I have to mention this as one of the few redeemable qualities of this movie…

You think Clear Eyes works on gamma radiation?

Monster Movie Mayhem

The one really cool aspect about The Incredible Hulk is that it feels like a monster movie. Everything from hiding the creature in the shadows during the first “hulk-out” in the bottling plant, to the blaring horn-filled soundtrack evokes the Dracula or Wolfman films of Old Hollywood. Even the scene in the cave looks like it could be taken right out of Frankenstein. It gave the audience a completely different experience from Iron Man. It may not have paid off in the same way, but at least Marvel showed that they were a studio capable of making different films.

Betty: Whatcha thinkin' 'bout?
Hulk: Oh, just smashin' stuffs.

Banner

Bruce Banner had a really interesting arc in this film. He starts off wanting to get rid of the thing causing him this grief, almost gets rid of it, and then realizes that he had the power within him all along (paraphrasing, watch the movie)! It’s rare for a superhero to lament his powers, and even more rare (rarer?) to come full circle like this. In addition to his arc, the look of Banner is spot-on. He is lean, thin and small, calling to mind the look of a starving animal. Rather than looking like cartoon character, such as Captain America or Thor, Banner looks like a guy that has actually been on the run for years.

Look, The Incredible Hulk is not a bad or unwatchable film, but it certainly isn’t the crown jewel of the MCU either. The flaws in this film hinder it from achieving anything other than a film one would watch on SYFY at 3:00pm on a Sunday. So, without further ado, Let’s move on to what pisses me off about this flick.

What They Did Wrong

The Lame Villain

Much like Jeff Bridges, I have nothing against Tim Roth. I think he is a great actor and did the best he could with what he was given. But man, Marvel really missed the mark with their portrayal of Emil Blonsky. What could have been a menacing, intelligent brute to rival the Hulk in physical fortitude was turned into a generic, CGI nightmare whose primary motive for being evil was… drugs? I just finished watching this movie and I’m still a little fuzzy as to his motivation. The most disappointing thing is that Roth’s character starts out as an interesting, strong character. Sadly, that character ultimately goes nowhere. And I thought Iron Monger was a lousy villain.

Don't do drugs, kids.

The Dialogue

The Incredible Hulk plays like a silent movie for about 75% of the run time. Sad-sounding music plays over the actors giving confused looks (emoting), either into the camera or at each other. This 75% of the movie is preferable to the fairly dreadful dialogue littered throughout the flick. When they aren’t making references to the old TV show, the actors are dropping truckloads of exposition. At one point, Betty Ross (Liv Tyler) literally says “Hey, we need to go back and talk about what happened in there!” referring to a scene that had just ended. I’m not a screenwriter, nor do I claim to understand the particulars of writing at all (as made evident by this project). However, if you have a character state that we need more explaining, perhaps it’s time to take another pass at the script.

Just play sad piano music over this image and you have most of the movie.

The Continuity

Banner sleeps as the military begins to breech his apartment. Fortunately, Banner is one step ahead, escapes his apartment, and begins walking the streets of Brazil under the cover of night. Blonsky recognizes Banner, and begins chasing him through the congested, narrow pathways of the city. Banner runs across buildings, through bars, across a soccer court, all while being mercilessly pursued by Blonsky and his men; the sun hot on his back. Finally, Banner takes refuge in the bottling factory, long after everyone has left for the night. So, either Banner ran from these guys for a full twelve hours without his heart rate exceeding 200 bpm, or the editing team needs to be drawn and quartered. Night-to-day-to-night does NOT a coherent scene make. If this were the only situation of awful continuity, I would let it slide. Sadly, the entire movie is plagued by poor editing.

A typical Brazilian night.

No Pay-Off

This movie introduced Ty Burell as Leonard Samson (aka Doc Samson) and Tim Blake Nelson as Samuel Stern (aka The Leader). Both of these characters have the potential to play a significant role somewhere in the MCU. Don’t have room for them in the movies? Fine! You have an entire television division that can be dedicated to bringing these characters to life, Marvel! Can you imagine Samson working as a criminal profiler in Hell's Kitchen, or working to rehabilitate the few super villains left alive? What about the Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. going up against The Leader as the “big bad” for season 3? In addition, we still have Emil Blonsky (The Abomination) in play, as he was LEFT ALIVE AT THE END OF THE MOVIE! And where has Betty Ross been this entire time? Did General Ross just decide to retire at the end of this movie? There are so many potential story lines set up in this single movie that we have yet to see. It’s frustrating.

Alas, Horacio. I fear it shall never be my time to shine.

Marvel and Universal didn’t do a lot of things wrong, per se, but the things that were poorly executed are far too representative of the overall picture to overlook.

Final Thoughts

The Incredible Hulk debuted on June 13^th, 2008. This was about a month after Iron Man and a month before The Dark Knight, so it's easy to see how people missed it in the theaters. This is the only MCU film I have not seen during an early screening (I.E. midnight shows or earlier). Instead, I saw the flick in a crowded auditorium the Saturday after it came out with my cousins and my siblings. This situation would have been fine if we had the opportunity to sit next to each other. Unfortunately, the auditorium was far too small and the crowd too large for us to find seats together. Overall, not a great viewing experience. If it had been, maybe I would have fonder memories to this movie like I do Iron Man (doubtful).

The entire theater went apeshit when Tony Stark appeared in the final scene, and that was all I heard anybody talking about on the way out. No mention of Hulk, Abomination, or anything else for that matter. People seemed to have forgotten about it, and, as stated above, Marvel hasn’t exactly done anything to remind people that this movie even exists. Much like Banner himself, The Incredible Hulk fades into the crowd and disappears from thought. Not a great sophomoric attempt for the MCU.

So, where does The Incredible Hulk rank on my list of MCU Films?

 1.
 2.
 3.
 4. Iron Man
 5.
 6.
 7.
 8.
 9.
10. The Incredible Hulk

Shocking, I know.

END OF DAY 2

Thank you to all of my readers! Do you agree with my ranking? Are there any great moments or errant flaws that I missed? Did Hulk's hands and feet look stupid, or was it just me? Can I just skip to The Avengers? Let me know in the comments below!

Be kind to each other.

-James